Elect This:

Well folks, the first Tuesday after the first Monday of November is imminent, and we all know what that means. It's Midterm Election time: a magical season that comes but once every four years, during which all adult Americans once again get the chance to participate in the democratic process (but only less than half do). Big things happen this time of year. Governors and Congress members are elected; ballot proposals are weighed; kings die and empires fall. And when it's all over, you even get to walk away with a little red, white and blue lapel sticker. Who's the responsible citizen now?!

In all seriousness, though, the Modern Pea Pod believes in the power of the vote - even in less, erm, popular election years like this one. We're all registered voters (aside from the two or three of us with felony convictions), and while it's sometimes a matter of debate at the MPP World HQ whether a good old-fashioned armed takeover might solve things more efficiently, we can all agree at the very least that voting is "better than nothing." Besides, let's face it: regardless of which side of the political fence you sit, the increasingly divided state of our nation means that this election will be a damned important one. So if Tuesday rolls around and you find yourself having trouble mustering up the motivation to head to the polls - Lord knows enough of us do - just pop this mixtape into the nearest Walkman, and we guarantee it will get you pumped enough to vote at least two or three times over. And that, my friends, is what democracy is all about.

- Zach Hoskins

Side A

0:05 - Alice Cooper: "Elected" (4:10)
Noble ideals about patriotic duty aside, the real issue behind any election can be boiled down to just four words: "I wanna be elected." So why not start this mixtape with a good old-fashioned campaign speech - with guitars? Zach Hoskins elaborates: "Each election year, the weeks (and months) leading up to the big day are filled with campaign propaganda; candidate after candidate telling you why a vote for them would be better served than a vote for anyone else. But what if a candidate came along who genuinely had something different to say...and a nifty boa constrictor to help him say it? That's why Alice Cooper's 'Elected' is such a brilliant campaign ad: he says what the kids really want to hear, proclaiming, 'We're all gonna rock to the rules that I make!' So sorry, politicians - this year Alice Cooper's got my vote. Maybe we'll talk once you incorporate onstage beheadings into your get-out-the-vote rallies."
(Available on Alice Cooper's Greatest Hits)

4:15 - A-Ha: "I Wish I Cared" (4:21)
Aaron Kahn: "Democracy. It's perhaps the most wonderful word in the English language. It gives us, the citizens of the free world, the rights that make life worth living. We have the power to shape our nations, and this is, indeed, what makes our world 'free.' We can do what we want. We can say what we want. We can be what we want. All the system asks of us in return is to come together every few years and express ourselves through the ballot box - to fulfill our civic duty and choose the men and women who will come to power and make the most of our freedoms. It's a beautiful, glorious expression of what the great revolutionary war was fought for.

"But enough of that flowery, flag-waving shit. Look, these are midterm elections. The fact of the matter is, even when the presidential seat is up for grabs, American voter turnout is lower than the average republic overseas. If it takes so much just to get us off our asses when we have to pick the most powerful man in the world, what makes anybody think that we're going to care any more when a few congressmen and governors are trying to get reelected? It's going to take more than just Jon Stewart and a few proposals about affirmative action and dove hunting to motivate this country of lard-butts.

"Thus, my choice for this mixtape is 'I Wish I Cared' by those wonderful Norwegian synthpop all-stars, A-Ha. Because, frankly, I do really wish that I cared about mid term elections. I want to make America the best nation that it can be... but 90210 was just released on DVD, and frankly I have more important things to do."
(Available on Minor Earth Major Sky)

8:36 - Neko Case & Her Boyfriends: "Thrice All American" (3:13)
But wait - don't park your ass in front of that TV just yet, constituents! Midterm elections - even, arguably, all elections - are about the small things; the heartland hometowns and the seemingly minor local policies which end up affecting them more than any big, romantic, and ultimately dead-end issues like gay marriage or Intelligent Design. This is why we go to the polls: to protect the little things and improve our country from the ground up. Megan Giddings testifies: "For this election day, it's best to remember our values and not buy into false promises. We may all want to believe that everything is getting better, especially with the politicians making promises left and right for a better America... a better Michigan! But, sometimes, it's time to vote to protect our cities and the dusty nostalgia that makes us love them. If I could, I would throw my vote in with Neko Case and her policy against big business and preserving the small businesses that were America's foundation. Oh, you didn't hear her speech? Then listen again to 'Thrice All American' and her gratifying rant against Wal-Mart."
(Available on Furnace Room Lullaby)

11:49 - The Jackson 5: "ABC" (2:56)
But as long as we're addressing apathy, there's an even more compelling reason to vote this year: because frankly, it's easy as freaking A-B-C. I mean, if our guest writer Geech McDaniels could handle it, arguably anyone could: "The first, and last, time I voted was in the midterm elections of 1974. I've never been a man very interested in politics or the way our government works. Besides, by the time I was of legal voting age, I was usually far from my local voting district,and let's face it - I'm not the kind of guy who's going to take the time to fill out a form and put it in the mail. But as things happened, I was back for a little while in my hometown and permanent residence of Memphis, Tennessee when November of '74 rolled around. Of course, that wasn't why I bothered to drive the five minutes to my old junior high gym. I just wanted pussy.

"Now, when I talked to these Modern Pea Pod babies about this mixtape, they made it sound like they were living in this important, very political moment. Let me give your generation a word of advice: you don't know what 'political' is until your country wraps up a near decade-long, bloody, unpopular war. I get these whiny little kids coming into my bar all the time and bitching to me about Iraq. You think you kids know politics just because some guy in Florida strokes it a few times while thinking about his teenage assistants' assholes? Let me tell you this: Iraq was no Vietnam. And this was only a few months after Nixon had resigned. The whole country was damned tired. And we were damned pissed.

"Of course, I couldn't have given a rat's ass about Nixon, Ford, or anybody else. Way I saw it - it didn't really have much of an impact on the way I did things. And Vietnam was finally done with; voting wasn't going to make one pig's fart's worth of a difference. But, well, I happened to be seeing this nice young girl at the time. And the ladies back then saw it pretty fashionable to go around trying to change the world. I can't remember my mother ever saying a single word about politics, but the gals my age always wanted to fight for something or other. So like I say, I happened to be having a good time with just such a girl, and she rattled off political talk all day long. Pussy can make men do some pretty strange things, and somehow she had me registering right there and then. I can't really remember who or what I voted for that day, but I definitely can remember that on the way to place my vote, this Jackson 5 ditty was playing on the radio in my car. So there you have it: my contribution and memory of democracy in action."
(Available on The Ultimate Collection)

14:45 - Neil Young: "Campaigner" (3:30)
Zach: "Wait a second...is that the guy who wrote 'Ohio' admitting that 'even Richard Nixon has got soul'? Nah, don't worry...it's just an excoriating, if elliptical indictment of the inherently hypocritical electoral process. And even if Neil is showing a little sympathy for Tricky Dick in the process, it sure beats that weird pro-Reagan era he had in the '80s. Gross."
(Available on Decade)

18:15 - Aimee Mann: "One" (2:53)
Laura Misjak: "I've unfortunately had to cover a couple of elections as a journalist over the past few years, and each time, I happen to be right there when the candidate loses. I'm always stuck with the loser; and though it's usually a known fact before the election that this particular candidate has no shot, somehow they don't know it until the numbers come in. They still have hope, but when you've only got six percent of the vote, like one of the candidates I was with, you've got to let it go somewhere down the line. It's the sad side of election day: there can only be one winner in most cases, and 'One' is the song for the good guy who just can't garner the votes. This is for you, naive politician man, because I've seen that look in your eye when you've realized you just spent tens of thousands on a deflated campaign. One is the loneliest number, and the losers can all relate."
(Available on Magnolia (OST))

21:08 - Gang of Four: "I Found That Essence Rare" (3:13)
Of course, the other side of the democracy coin is that the winner might just not have deserved his win; in fact, he might be a corrupt bastard of a politician, the kind of leader agit-prop bands like Gang of Four live to call out...and whom we can hopefully get out of office the next time elections come around. Megan testifies: "Gang of Four's Entertainment! may have come out in 1979, but its message is entirely relevant today. 'I Found That Essence Rare' addresses the oppression of women, the ever-corrupt nature of politicians, and the ability for everyone to be so pissed off, but still silent. Rioting in the streets may not be your thing, but this year, it's time to riot by motherfucking voting!"
(Available on Entertainment!)

24:21 - James Brown: "Funky President (People It's Bad)" (4:00)
Zach: "Aside from its own purpose of electing Congressional representatives and state officials, the midterm election also serves as a convenient set-up for the coming presidential election, around which many potential candidates announce (or at least 'suggest') their intentions to run. The big news this time around is, of course, that Illinois golden boy Barack Obama may run in 2008; and while I'm as thrilled by the prospect of a black president as the next guy, am I the only one who thinks Obama might not be...well, 'funky' enough?

"I'll tell you one thing - if anybody can lay claim to the adjective 'funky,' it's the Minister of the New New Super Heavy Funk himself, James Brown. And unlike that Johnny-come-lately Obama, Brother James announced his intentions for the presidency at least as early as 1974, with his classic single 'Funky President (People It's Bad)'. Over one funky-as-shit drum break (hey, if he's gonna be the 'Funky President,' he'd better have a song that lives up to the name), Brown gives us the state of the nation ('Stock market goin' up / Jobs goin' down / There ain't no funky job to be found'), then provides us with his foolproof solution: 'Turn on your funk motor / Get down and praise the lord / Get sexy, sexy / Get funky and dance.' Okay, so maybe he doesn't have all the answers. But in this political age of the soundbite, who more fitting to elect than the man who once reduced the problem of inner-city delinquency to the phrase 'Killing is Out, School is In?' Forget Obama; vote Brown/Wesley in 2008!"
(Available on Make It Funky - The Big Payback: 1971-1975)

28:21 - P.O.S. feat. Craig Finn: "Safety in Speed (Heavy Metal)" (4:17)
Aaron: "A couple of years ago, the unthinkable happened. For the second time in recent American memory, the people of California voted into the office of Governor a really mediocre actor. Even worse, despite falling approval ratings throughout the past few years, Arnold Schwarzenegger's popularity is bouncing back, and present polls give him a fairly reasonable lead over Democratic challenger Phil Angelides. It begs the question: what the fuck is wrong with California?

"In 'Safety in Speed,' from his sophomore record Audition, hip-hop artist P.O.S. opens with Craig Finn of the Hold Steady spouting lyrics recalling a trip to the movies to see 1987's Predator. He points out, with some chagrin, that the kitschy action flick starred not one, but two future gubernatorial victors. He warns his listeners to stop listening to the 'double speakers from the double features.'

"Perhaps it's too early to know what will happen on Tuesday the 7th; after all, both candidates still have a fair amount of hours to shape the outcome of the voting. More to the point, it is, perhaps, not the duty of a self-important pop culture writer to express any opinions political. Still, I can't help but hope that when the Hollywood types and San Francisco hippies enter the booths and get their patriotic 'I Voted!' stickers next week, they'll heed the message of 'Safety in Speed': 'Keep 'em in the theatres.'"
(Available on Audition)

32:38 - Bootsy Collins: "#1 Funkateer" (3:27)
Zach: "As we all know, far too few American youth make it to the polls come election time. Obviously, in a political system which bases itself on participatory democracy, this is a problem, and many solutions have already been proposed; some promising, some not so much. But hasn't anyone considered the possibility of making the notion of public office a little less...well, stuffy? I'm willing to bet that Bootsy Collins has, which explains this 1982 song: wouldn't you be more willing to vote if the offices had titles like '#1 Funkateer' instead of boring old 'Senator' and 'State Representative'? And wouldn't it be kick-ass if, instead of 'Hail to the Chief,' they played a hot funk track with a lot of Vocoder, heavily processed handclaps, and Bootsy's trademark 'space bass' whenever the president walked into the room? No, seriously, I think we've got a winner here!"
(Available on Glory B Da' Funk's on Me! The Bootsy Collins Anthology)

36:05 - The Mothers of Invention: "Brown Shoes Don't Make It" (7:30)
Zach: "Though it's arguably been proven time and time again, the recent scandal around Republican Congressman Mark Foley has underlined a simple truth: those individuals in power who claim to uphold a moral standard for their constituents are most often those whose own private morals are found lacking. It's an issue Frank Zappa addressed intuitively with his 1967 pop operetta 'Brown Shoes Don't Make It': a wickedly funny and often disturbing portrait of 'a world of secret hungers / perverting the men who make your laws.' The 'City Hall Fred' of Zappa's narrative has a wife and a civic responsibility, to be sure, but he's also got a thirteen-year-old mistress who, apparently not to his chagrin, reminds him of his daughter; why, if the object of his affection had only been male, he could almost be a real Congressman! So when you're voting for your local 'family values' candidate this coming Tuesday, just remember 'Brown Shoes Don't Make It'...and don't come crying to me when they catch him in the midst of a crystal meth'n'sodomy ring with The Good Reverend Ted Haggart."
(Available on Absolutely Free)

Total Runtime: 43:35

Side B

0:05 - Kinky Friedman: "Rock and Roll Across the USA" (2:07)
In recent election years, the dialogue regarding independent and third-party candidates has grown more and more passionate. Supporters of third parties argue that it's the only conscionable choice in an age of political corruption when differences between Democrats and Republicans are often less than evident, while opponents, citing Ralph Nader's presidential bids in 2000 and 2004, claim that the nation is in such a state of division that to vote for a third-party candidate is tantamount to throwing one's vote away. The Modern Pea Pod normally refrains from such debates - we find that reviewing records is much more our speed - but we do have at least one candidate to endorse this election, and he just so happens to be an independent. He's Kinky Friedman, the legendary Texas Jewboy himself, and Zach will take it from here: "I'll admit; I have no idea what the fuck Kinky is going on about on this 1979 (released 1995) outtake. But as perhaps the most promising - and certainly the most entertaining - candidate in this year's Texas gubernatorial race, one imagines that Friedman has been doing a lot of 'rocking and rolling across the USA' himself...or at least the Lone Star state. So whatever our cigar-chomping hero means by 'everybody knows that the wheel's got to roll,' to our Texas readership, remember to Vote Kinky. Or at least buy some of his salsa."
(Available on From One Good American to Another)

2:12 - Lauryn Hill: "Every Ghetto, Every City" (5:14)
Abby Stotz: "In this election season, when every Ivy League-educated candidate miraculously came from a coal mining grandfather, Lauryn Hill's 'Every Ghetto, Every City' reminds us how refreshing an honest autobiography can be. Hill recounts her childhood, and hits all the highlights - from riding a Mongoose bicycle to Saturday morning cartoons. It's a positive look back, laid over a block-party type of beat. 'You know it's hot, don't forget what you got'; wouldn't campaign commercials be better if the candidates would just talk about themselves?"
(Available on The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill)

7:26 - Funkadelic: "One Nation Under a Groove" (7:28)
Zach: "One listen to the modern American political rhetoric, with its culture wars and color-coded states, should speak the obvious far more eloquently than I ever could, but here goes nothing anyway: we are living in highly divisive times. And no, there aren't any easy answers. But for my money, George Clinton had the right idea in 1978. We don't have to be a nation divided; we could be 'One Nation Under a Groove,' a place where Democrats and Republicans, blacks and whites, etc., etc. all get their shot at the American Dream. And while Clinton understandably speaks in the language he knows best - 'funk, the whole funk and nothin' but the funk' - the message of 'One Nation' can be applied just as widely as you like: look for the commonalities between us, rather than the differences which drive us apart, and 'nothing can stop us now.'"
(Available on One Nation Under a Groove)

14:54 - The Staple Singers: "Long Walk to D.C." (2:30)
Zach: "In Michigan, November 7 will mark the long-anticipated date for voters to make their decision regarding the so-called 'Michigan Civil Rights Initiative,' a ballot proposal which purports to end preferential affirmative action programs and claims to do so in the spirit of past, progressive legislation like the 1964 Civil Rights Act and the 14th Amendment. Now I won't get into my feelings about affirmative action in general; that's a can of worms that need not be opened in this particular forum. But I can say, with some assertion, that the rhetoric exhibited by the MCRI and its supporters is an insult to the very real American Civil Rights struggle depicted in this 1968 song by the Staple Singers.

"See, regardless of how you feel about affirmative action (I know I have my misgivings), it can't be denied that the affluent white folks supposedly 'victimized' by these programs never had to struggle for their basic human rights the way economically deprived blacks in Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, Florida, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, Arkansas, Tennessee, Oklahoma, and Kansas did. They never had to worry about their votes not being counted, or receiving violent retribution at the hands of racist mobs for their efforts, and I'm willing to bet that they never had hoses turned upon them in the street, either. So yes, you're perfectly free to vote however you like on Proposal 2. But just keep in mind that the concept of 'Civil Rights' is a hell of a lot closer to the Staples' 'Long Walk to D.C.' than it is to some spoiled Michiganian's sour grapes over a rejected college application. And that, folks, is the hard truth."
(Available on Soul Folk in Action)

17:24 - Electric Six: "Nuclear War (On the Dance Floor)" (1:16)
Needless to say, with the Iraqi insurgency still raging and no believable end in sight - not to mention possible crises brewing with both Iran and Korea - Americans will have war on the brain come election time. For that, Megan has a simple enough solution: "This election day, folks, it's time to vote for only one type of nuclear war: NUCLEAR FUCKING WAR ON THE DANCE FLOOR. NO BOMBING OTHER COUNTRIES UNLESS IT'S WITH A GOOD ASS SHAKE. OKAY?"
(Available on Fire)

18:40 - John Lennon: "Gimme Some Truth" (3:16)
Zach: "'I'm sick and tired of hearing things from uptight, short-sighted, narrow-minded hypocritics.' Yep, that pretty much sums it up. Oh, that and 'no short-haired, yellow-bellied son of Tricky Dicky's gonna Mother Hubbard soft soap me with just a pocketful of soap.'"
(Available on Imagine)

21:56 - Ted Nugent: "Wango Tango" (4:51)
Zach: "Last election, 11 states (including our own Michigan) approved anti-gay marriage amendments which established beyond a shadow of a doubt that legally recognized marriage would only take place between a man and a woman - and, arguably, helped get more voters to the polls in favor of George W. Bush. This year, prospective same-sex couples in eight more states will face the chopping block. Now the voters in those states are bound to make their own decisions, and I respect that. But before they do, I want them all to listen to Ted Nugent's 'Wango Tango'... and remember just how sacred a right they're dealing with.

"Okay, okay, I'll admit that Uncle Ted's second career as a conservative 'family values' pundit probably precludes his coming out as a defender of the individual's right to choose their partner. But, well, I'm of the mind that people who become the legal guardians of 17-year-old girls in order to skirt age of consent laws shouldn't throw stones. And besides, from its rallying cry of 'C'mon boys! Time to Wango!' to its midsong spoken-word segment, almost certainly describing the mechanics of gay anal sex (from 'getting your belly propped down' and 'your butt propped up' to the use of 'a little talcum' for lubrication), 'Wango Tango' is the best theme song for the joys of gay marriage - and its inevitable consummation - I can think of. So people, listen to the Nuge this election year, and remember to defend the right of all of us to do the wango tango with the person of our choosing. I'll thank you, America's gay community will thank you, and while he might not want to admit it, I think Ted will thank you, too."
(Available on Scream Dream)

26:47 - Manic Street Preachers: "Ifwhiteamerica..." (3:40)
Aaron: "In the year of what became, arguably, the most crucial midterm election of my lifetime - 1994 - Wales' Manic Street Preachers put forth their third full-length record in as many years. As one of the angstiest songs on what many consider to be the band's angstiest record, 'Ifwhiteamerica...' opens, in classic Richey Edwards fahsion, with a sampled audio clip promoting a Ronald Reagan birthday television extravaganza. The rest of the song is a free-form flowing critique of U.S. and British politics, full of anger and the passion of youth. All of this is topped off with a seriously powerful and catchy chorus backed with a militant drum beat. The song asks in plain English the question that defines the foolish way Americans always seem to cast their ballots: 'Who shall we choose for our morality?'

"Little wonder that 1994 was the year the Republicans took both houses for the first time in over 40 years. Oh, and Texas got a new governor, too... but you all know how that turned out."
(Available on The Holy Bible)

30:27 - Deee-Lite: "Vote, Baby, Vote" (0:32)
But maybe our ambivalence toward democracy has been too confusing for readers; maybe we're sending the wrong message, that the American public are fools who elect perverts and maniacs into public office, and we should all just stay home this Tuesday and forget about it. If that is indeed the message you've been getting, then Zach has a new one for you - with a little help from Deee-Lite: "What else is there to say but 'Vote, Baby, Vote'? Okay, well what about if we repeated it six times over a big early '90s dance beat? Are you registered now, baby?"
(Available on Infinity Within)

30:59 - Prince: "Call My Name" (5:15)
Or if merely pressuring you to vote isn't enough, what if we told you your civil rights were at stake? On that note, here's Megan with a word about post-Patriot Act domestic wiretapping from a man who knows what it's like to be disenfranchised: "Look, I don't ever want Prince to run for public office. I may love him dearly. Shit, I may even take a bullet for His Purple Highness. But whenever Prince gets political, it's just like, awwww shit. Prince, we all know you're crazy. And 'Call My Name' proves this, when in the middle of a sensual slow jam, Prince starts going off on a tangent about the government bugging his phone and calling for the war to end. 'Land of the free? Somebody lied! / They can bug my phone, people 'round my home, they'll only see you and me making love inside.' ...Let's vote to keep Prince off the ballot, okay?"
(Available on Musicology)

36:14 - Stevie Wonder: "You Haven't Done Nothin'" (3:22)
More than anything, though, midterms are a time to right the wrongs done by the screw-ups we elected two years ago; hey, there's a reason why only two successful recall elections have taken place in US history. Instead, let's cast our ballots on the 7th just to make President Bush a lame duck - or, depending on your politics, to get that tax-and-spend liberal incumbent out of office - and let's do it to the tune of this anthem provided by Zach: "Like most political songs written in the early '70s, 'You Haven't Done Nothin'' is addressed directly to President Richard M. Nixon. But its themes of betrayal and righteous anger, of raising one's voice against self-serving hypocrisy, are just as meaningful today...maybe even more so. So if you feel like 2006 is the year to finally unseat that loud-mouthed, do-nothing, ineffectual politician you loathe - be they Trent Lott or Jennifer Granholm - this, my friends, is your jam."
(Available on Fulfillingness' First Finale)

39:36 - Avril Lavigne: "Complicated" (4:04)
And now we come to the end of our celebration of all things democratic, with an example of what just might be the most democratic act of all: the little guy (or girl) speaking out about the Big Issues. Yes, it's young Avril Lavigne, and she's got something to say to us about our all-too-human foibles. Take it away, Laura: "Yes, I do realize that submitting an Avril Lavigne song is a bit daring for me if I expect to be taken seriously, especially since the song is so, well, corny. But, 'Complicated' is truly all about election season and the ever-changing faces of politicians. How could it not be? Why do they have to make everything so complicated? And I know I've certainly had those times where I'm sitting at home and a candidate 'comes over unannounced, dressed up like they're something else.' It's sad, you see; it's making me laugh out when they strike their pose. They become somebody else around us, watching their backs like they can't realize, trying to be cool. They look like fools to me. Besides, it's known far and wide that little miss Avril wrote this song about the constant tension and mockery in the Canadian Parliament." Yes, as the lady herself said, "life's like this." See you next month, everybody. And may your day of civic duty be dutiful.
(Available on Let Go)

Total Runtime: 43:40

Tape Runtime (Sides A & B): 87:15

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