Love, lust and loneliness – Valentine’s Day must be like Christmas for songwriters. After all, the love song (and its reverse, the break-up song) stands as pop’s ultimate cheap thrill: easy to write and easier to listen to, its appeal comes to us immediately because we fill in the blanks with our own experiences. Everyone has fallen in love, and almost everyone has fallen out of it, too; these feelings have mass appeal because they truly are universal. So when we hear a great love song, it’s less like hearing somebody tell us about their lives and more like reliving our own. So what if many of the great love songs weren’t inspired by great romances? So what if, like John Lennon said, 90% of the Beatles’ early tunes didn’t stem from personal experience?

We experience these songs with the intensity of a real-life love affair, and that’s what’s important; the “She” in “She Loves You” might not have been a real person, but the love was real. So in celebration of this most romantic (and loneliest) of holidays – as well as those great twin songwriting traditions, those songs of love and heartbreak – we present this lovingly compiled mixtape, with two songs each by fourteen artists: Side A love, Side B loss. Maybe it won’t keep you warm at night (or make you loathe some heartless bitch with every fibre of your existence), the way real love can. But it’s our hope that for at least 90 minutes, it will remind you of just what a powerful and unexplainable force human connection can be.

Side A: Love Songs

0:05 – Billie Holiday: “Them There Eyes” (2:50)
It’s a mathematically-provable fact that there’s never been any music more romantic than the jazz pop of the 1930s and ’40s. And while that era was filled with its share of classic crooners, from Frank Sinatra to Ella Fitzgerald, none of them did it better than Billie. Megan explains: Those big brassy horns, Holiday’s heart-pounding jazz whisper, those sexy old movie cymbals…all of them combine to accurately manufacture the champagne glow of instant attraction. I bet Woody Allen falls in love every time he hears this song, too. (Available on The Ultimate Collection)

2:55 – Gloria Gaynor: “Reach Out, I’ll Be There” (3:21)
Aaron: In her cover of the 1966 Four Tops classic, Gloria Gaynor took the beat for ‘Reach Out, I’ll be There’ and made it rougher, harder, and faster. In short, she discofied it. But though it became an anthem for the dance floor, it was still an anthem of the heart, and the message remained the same: if you’re feeling down, baby, you can count on me. That’s what love means, when you get right down to it – and when I hear this song, I can’t help but get down. (Available on 20th Century Masters – The Millennium Collection)

6:16 – The Ronettes: “Walking in the Rain” (3:16)
David: It seems that far too few people are learned in girl groups. So here’s a quick lesson: before the Beatles changed everything, groups of girls sang bubblegum pop songs about naive love. The best of these songs had soaring, timeless melodies. Producer Phil Spector worked with many of the girl groups. Spector would pile innumerable layers of guitars, percussion, and strings onto the groups’ innocent tunes. This combination of cute lyrics, joyous melodies, and tons upon tons of pretty instruments is still overpowering, like having a ball of sunshine stuffed down your throat. Some people find it nauseating, and others find it overwhelming in the best possible way. The Ronettes were the greatest girl group, and ‘Walking in the Rain’ is what they sound like at the peak of their game. (Available on The Best of the Ronettes)

9:32 – Prince: “I Feel for You” (3:25)
Zach: Before Chakakahn, Chakakahn, and her ’80s-pop-a-fied rendition of “I Feel for You,” there was Prince. And frankly, the original version is still the best. Over a bed of synth and guitar as lush as the real ones in which he used to frolic onstage, the Purple One lights a few candles, slips into his best falsetto, and it’s seduction time. So what if ‘it’s mainly a physical thing?’ (Or, as Mr. Jehovah’s Witness sings it today, a ‘spiritual thing?’) It’s Prince. And when the come-on is as ebullient and joyous as this one, who wouldn’t want to fall in love with a tiny man in high heels? (Available on Prince)

12:57 – The Ramones: “Strength to Endure” (2:59)
Aaron: At first glance, with its talk of blood and hopelessness, this song seems incredibly depressing. But then it kicks into the chorus, and you realize that there’s only one thing that could get a person through all of that: love. This song is about a couple who are leaning on each other to survive and making it work, if only barely. We should all be so lucky. (Available on Mondo Bizarro)

15:56 – Yoko Ono: “Kiss Kiss Kiss” (2:41)
Megan: Maybe I’m just a sucker for the sound of an orgasm interspersed with Japanese phrases. Or maybe I like this song because it captures all of the wildness of love. Three parts desire and one part anxiety, Ono guides the listener through the valleys and clouds of love in a mere two minutes and forty-one seconds. (Available on Double Fantasy)

18:37 – Joe Jackson: “Fools in Love” (4:24)
Zach: If Cole Porter had lived and worked in 1970s and ’80s London instead of 1930s and ’40s New York, he would have been Joe Jackson. More than any other song on Jackson’s debut Look Sharp!, “Fools in Love” is proof: the lyrical motifs and piano solo are classicist pop at its best, updated with a reggae-influenced arrangement and a cynical approach to romance that are pure New Wave. But what makes this a truly marvelous song, instead of a mere Tin Pan Alley rehash, is the way Jackson feels every word he sings. It’s easy enough to say fools in love are zeroes…but Jackson knows, because he’s a fool in love himself. (Available on Look Sharp!)

23:01 – Leonard Bernstein & Stephen Sondheim: “Maria” (2:37)
David: I find musical theater to be insincere, predictable, condescending, wacky, homogenous, and disgustingly cute. I hate it. In other words: don’t dismiss “Maria” as another obnoxious love song from a musical, because I despise musicals twice as much as you do and yet “Maria” is my favorite love song ever written. The word ‘Maria’ is sung so many times throughout the song (29 in the original version), that it loses all of its original meaning. Once you’ve heard any word 29 times in rapid succession, it will become a string of nonsense syllables. By the time that the song is over, ‘Maria’ has stopped being a person in a play, and has become an abstract word representing all that is good about love. (Available on the West Side Story OST)

25:38 – The Gun Club: “Jack on Fire” (4:45)
Megan: No one ever said love couldn’t be freaky. And no one ever said all love songs have to turn out well, either. I mean come on guys, not a single one of you wouldn’t like to be fucked until you die? Oh… um… me either. I guess. (Available on Fire of Love)

30:24 – Sam Cooke: “Soothe Me” (2:11)
Aaron: We’ve all had that one guy friend. You know who I mean: that wild sort of boy who parties and goes from girl to girl with never a care in his mind. It always seems like he’ll have no hope of ever being tamed. But then he meets that one girl… a girl who’s got it. For under all that womanizing and wild exterior is a worn out soul, and like Sam sings: ‘you know your powerful love is soothing to me.’ Sometimes that’s all a boy needs to settle down. (Available on The SAR Records Story)

32:36 – Nina Nastasia: “Regrets” (3:15)
David: You think your love has a dark side? When Nina Nastasia writes a love song, it revolves around heroin and shame. “Regrets” is definitely a love song, though, as opposed to a heroin song. Listen to the drums. There isn’t any time signature, nor is there much of a pulse; the drummer staggers as if limping (Dirty Three fans will immediately recognize Jim White). This unsure rhythmic backbone matches with Nastasia’s simple, unsure voice; elements which, in addition to the naked arrangement (there’s nothing but drums, Nina, and plucked acoustic guitar), make “Regrets” one of the most vulnerable love songs I have ever heard. (Available on Run to Ruin)

35:51 – The Beatles: “I’m So Tired” (2:03)
Zach: Everybody knows love can keep you up at night…but it’s not always in a good way. John Lennon sings this song with the intense malaise of a man struggling against forces he knows he can’t control. The woman (Yoko, of course) is in his head and he can’t get her out. But he’s miles away. He’s married. And for that matter, he doesn’t even know for sure how she feels about him. It’s little wonder why this White Album highlight remains one of Lennon’s most passionate, soulful vocals: this shit is the real ‘Real Love’. (Available on The Beatles (White Album))

37:55 – Morrissey: “You’re the One for Me, Fatty” (2:58)
Aaron: Many years ago, Morrissey wrote, “I am human and I need to be loved, just like everybody else does.” And apparently he really believed in the meaning of those words. For Moz, everybody needs a little loving – even fatties. So, here, in his song of devotion for an unnamed fatty, he promises to stand by them, and to never be in their way. To get out of the way of a fat person is a gesture that could be nothing but one of love. Bravo, Steven Patrick! We should all follow your brave example. (Available on Your Arsenal)

40:53 – Elvis Costello & The Attractions: “Pidgin English” (3:58)
Megan: Elvis Costello can’t quite handle love, as clearly evidenced by most of his lyrics. In this particular song, he squares off against himself in a struggle of self-expression. He might not want to feel the emotions, but “Pidgin English” proves that even Costello, king of the He-Man Women Hater’s Club, can’t help but lose when the opponent is love. (Available on Imperial Bedroom)

Final Runtime: 44:51

Side B: Heartbreak Songs

0:05 – Joe Jackson: “One More Time” (3:18)
Zach: Sure, “One More Time” is one of my all-time favorite break-up songs, but it’s also one of my all-time favorite songs. Period. Why does it work so well? It isn’t just that diminuitive, pasty-faced, curmudgeonly Joe Jackson sounds like the last person in the world you’d want to piss off. It’s that his voice is the voice we all hear when the person we love tells us it’s over: angry, scathing, unreasonable – and most devastating of all, completely unable to accept that what he’s just heard is true. (Available on Look Sharp!)

3:23 – The Smiths: “Never Had No One Ever” (3:37)
Aaron: Losing love is a horrible thing, but what of those who never find it? If the title of this song doesn’t give away how ungodly depressing it is, maybe you’ll be convinced by Morrissey’s repetition of “I’m alone, I’m alone…” Sure, it is the whiniest song by the whiniest band of the 1980s (the whiniest decade, arguably, in all of western history), but heartbreak without whining is a pretty rare thing. So turn up the stereo, sit in the dark, eat some chocolate, and have a good cry. (Available on The Queen is Dead)

7:00 – The Gun Club: “For the Love of Ivy” (5:37)
Some people come out of a relationship and feel sorry for themselves for a couple weeks. Some, like a certain ex-Blondie Fan Club president turned peroxide-blonde narco bluesman, just buy a gun as long as their arm and kill everyone who ever done them wrong. Which is the healthier reaction? You be the judge. Megan: Jeffrey Lee Pierce was a KA-RAZY motherfucker. Any woman who entered a relationship with him should have known just from listening to “Love of Ivy” that you don’t fuck with this guy. With its maniacal screams and threatening lyrics, this revenge tale about a relationship gone sorely, sadly wrong is one of the most gratifying break-up songs of all time. (Available on Fire of Love)

12:37 – Danny Elfman: “Sally’s Song” (1:47)
David: “Sally’s Song” is a shining example of how good taste can be more emotionally powerful than gratuitous bombast. In character as Sally the rag doll from The Nightmare Before Christmas, Catherine O’Hara sings about unrequited love over a full orchestra – but it’s a very understated orchestra. Instead of soaring dramatically, the wind section merely chugs along. If you were to listen to it without the vocals, it wouldn’t sound the least bit sad. It would sound complacent and a little bored. As a result of this rather emotionless backing, O’Hara does not come across as the dramatic, lovesick hero most movie writers would have wanted. She sounds like a real life, regular person: vulnerable and small and enormously sad. (Available on The Nightmare Before Christmas OST)

14:24 – The Beatles: “For No One” (2:01)
Zach: Yeah, I know I’m hard on Paul McCartney. And yeah, I know he’s an easy target. But how’s this for making amends? “For No One,” a Paul number through and through, is one of the most impeccably crafted and absolute, knock your socks off gorgeous songs in the Beatles canon. It’s simple yet baroque, beautiful yet heartbreaking: like the world’s saddest ice sculpture. If all of our break-ups sounded like this, there would be no reason for break-up songs; we’d be only too thrilled to have our hearts broken over and over again. (Available on Revolver)

16:25 – Elvis Costello: “I’m Not Angry” (3:02)
Megan: Here, Elvis Costello successfully explains what is actually happening underneath that stoic, usually male phrase: “I’m Not Angry.” He screams, he insults, he plays loud music, but as he reminds us with every chorus, ‘He’s not angry.’ Well, Elvis, you just need to remember this: “Bitches ain’t shit but hos and tricks.” (Available on My Aim is True)

19:27 – Sam Cooke: “Only Sixteen” (1:54)
Aaron: We never forget our first love: how bright eyed and idealistic we are about it, how good it feels, how it seems like it will last forever. But it rarely does…and inevitably, somebody gets hurt. Still, we like to think that we learn something from the errors of young love: “Why did I give my heart so fast? It never will happen again.” Sure. Sure, it won’t. (Available on Portrait of a Legend 1951-1964)

21:22 – The Ronettes: “(The Best Part of) Breakin’ Up” (3:01)
David: New relationship = awesome. Breaking up = sucks. Starting again = awesome. Breaking up again = sucks. The wise, wise Ronettes know about the cycle of love. It’s wonderful and sad and always uncertain, they say. You break up and make up and can never be positive whether your current situation is a permanent one. Which begs the question: “O Ronettes, is all of the madness worth it?” They never explicitly tell us the answer, but they make it clear. The harmonies explode with joy as the drums march into the sunset. “Of course it’s worth it,’ they’re telling us. ‘Little child, you should never question that ever again.” (Available on The Best of the Ronettes)

24:23 – Prince: “Strange Relationship” (4:01)
Zach: Nobody, but nobody, has explored the psychological intricacies of the heterosexual relationship like Prince. He’s got songs about love, songs about sex, songs about breaking up…and in “Strange Relationship,” possibly his most awe-inspiring ‘love song,’ he has a song about the moment when you realize your love has gone sour. When Prince sings, “Baby I just can’t stand 2 see u happy/More than that, I hate 2 see u sad,” chills run down my spine. And when he threatens, “Honey if u left me I just might do something rash,” one gets a pretty good feeling he means business. Stunning, heart-wrenching intimacy from a songsmith with so much more depth than just “1999.” (Available on Sign O’ the Times)

28:24 – The Ramones: “The KKK Took My Baby Away” (2:29)
Sure, it sucks to see your baby leave of her own free will. But the ultimate heartbreak is seeing her taken away by a notorious hate group…or even just the guitarist from the Ramones. Aaron: It’s a well-known fact that Johnny Ramone had a fairly conservative political view, especially for a punk rocker in the 1970s. That fact is the root of the rumors and myths which surround this legendary (and fantastic) Ramones track. According to the story, after Johnny stole Joey Ramone’s girlfriend Linda (whom he eventually married), this song was written as retribution. I’m not here to validate whether or not the ‘KKK’ in “The KKK Took My Baby Away” is Johnny Ramone, but do we really need to know for sure? It’s a great story, and a fantastic song about one man’s broken heart. (Available on Pleasant Dreams)

30:53 – Billie Holiday: “Lady Sings the Blues” (3:46)
Megan: This is the song of love gone sour on a rainy day. You might just want to lie in bed and listen to your sad bastard music, but you don’t want to give some man the satisfaction of ruining your day. So you go to a nice restaurant and smoke a cigarette and drink a glass of wine. And you act like everything is great while you pick over your dinner and sip your wine. But you know everyone notices that you’re alone, and you wish he was there…but he’s not. (Available on The Ultimate Collection)

34:39 – Nina Nastasia: “All Your Life” (3:45)
David: I love music that conveys lost innocence. I’m a huge Pet Sounds freak, and Sly & The Family Stone’s ultra-disillusioned There’s a Riot Goin’ On is my number one album of the ’70s. It’s fitting, then, that “All Your Life” is my favorite breakup song. The melody is as deliberate and simple as melodies get, like a children’s tune. It makes the tough biker subject of the song seem like a little kid. Which is why it’s like being stabbed in the chest when Nina Nastasia drops that bomb of a drug reference. Just like “Regrets” from Side A, “All Your Life” is a song that involves heroin but is really about love. It’s the tragic story of a confused, frustrated boy who has been burned by love and is doing whatever he can to no longer feel brokenhearted. (Available on Dogs)

38:24 – Gloria Gaynor: “Let Me Know (I Have a Right)” (3:14)
Aaron: Gloria Gaynor sang “I Will Survive,” perhaps the most famous track of the disco era; and while it’s about the end of a relationship, it can hardly be viewed as a song of heartbreak. “I Will Survive” is all about overcoming such bullshit, but “Let Me Know” is about being trapped in it. It’s about being caught in a relationship where the love has died. It’s about the cowardice of a lying man. All she wants is to finally have the truth so she can move on, and the fact is that she deserves that – it’s her goddamned right. (Available on 20th Century Masters – The Millennium Collection)

41:40 – Yoko Ono: “I Don’t Know Why (a capella version)” (2:11)
Say what you will about John and Yoko…the story of their love is one of the most intensely, honestly and exhaustively chronicled, by both sides of the relationship, in the history of popular music. So it’s only fitting that we close this mixtape with the story of one woman’s tragic loss. Sure, when John Lennon died, we lost a brilliant songwriter, an iconic musician and a legendary personality…but how much more did Yoko lose? Megan: If anyone has suffered the ultimate break-up, it’s Yoko. Her stripped down vocals on this demo are raw with emotion, and the silence that surrounds her when she sings ‘the room is so empty without you’ make it hard for any listener – despite their feelings on Ono as a person or a musican – not to feel for her. (Available on Season of Glass (Rykodisc Reissue))

Final Runtime: 43:51

Total Runtime (Sides A & B): 88:42

See Also… (more great songs that just couldn’t fit):

Belle & Sebastian: “Mayfly,” from If You’re Feeling Sinister and “I Don’t Love Anyone,” from Tigermilk (Dan)
Bob Dylan: “Lay Lady Lay,” from Nashville Skyline and “You’re Gonna Make Me Lonesome When You Go,” from Blood on the Tracks (Zach)
The Velvet Underground: “I’ll Be Your Mirror,” from The Velvet Underground & Nico and “Pale Blue Eyes,” from The Velvet Underground (Megan)

Lovingly Compiled by the Modern Pea Pod Staff